Cruel Dance

2003-08-26 - 11:46 p.m.

I had a touch of insomnia last night. Not as bad as when I was on Adderall and would try and try to get to sleep but end up awake until 5am. I just didn't feel like sleeping so I stayed up til about 2:30.

Usually, the first step to defeat insomnia is to go take a walk and have a smoke (not cigarettes anymore, a cigar). When that didn't work, I decided to write. While I was walking, bits and pieces of a sonnet started weaving themselves together as I was thinking about love and why it never comes my way. Here it is for your reading pleasure....

Cruel Dance

Love, why do you conceal yourself from me?
My every true endeavor you have shunned.
Despite your fabled blindness, my heart sees
You fleeing from each fleeting course I run.
Was it for cruelty that you came before
To lead me dancing ere I knew your steps?
You spun me, twirled my heart around life's floor,
And left me in a devastated sweat.
For long years since I've tried to dance alone,
But in my heart I hear no rhythm sweet.
In every note I hear an ugly drone,
And with each step I stomp on someone's feet.
If you're as false a partner as you seem,
Please wake me up that I might cease to dream. 8/26/03

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